A surprise spin on the traditional greeting card with a wicked sense of humour. Remember, some people (without a sense of humour ) may find our cards offensive.

Reasons I Fucking Hate Birthday Cards.
Reason 1. You have to stand at the store + read a whole bunch to find a good one. (Unless you’re only reading our cards. They’re all good.)
Reason 2. You’re paying for a piece of paper that’s just gonna get tossed. (Ours become family heirlooms.)
Reason 3. You look cheap if you don’t put money or a gift card inside. (When they open it cautiously expecting something to fall out + you’re watching knowing it’s empty… the worst.)

Inside:

Reason 4. It likely means that I was invited to a celebration of some sort.
(That means being around people.)